Sometimes, other people's money is none of your business
Why we lie about our salaries.
Hi, I’m Renée, a finance and business journalist, writer, and content strategist. The Budgette is a chill newsletter about single finances and lifestyle and is published twice a month to more than 2,000 subscribers, some paid - thank you as that supports my ability to take time to interview experts. I prefer to write when I have something to say and when I’m not here, I work on content strategy and execution for Canadian and U.S. publications and brands. If you want to work together, message me or you can find me on LinkedIn. There is a direct message option now but don’t do that. I probably won’t see it in time.
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A recent article in the Globe and Mail reported that “according to a Ustats survey commissioned by BonusFinder Canada, a source for online gambling bonuses, more than half of Canadians (55.6 per cent) have lied about their salary, with people living in Ottawa coming in as the biggest culprits.” (Damn, Ottawa, why?)
One reason is relationship management. You don’t want to breed or be resentful of your or your friend’s salary. Plus, salary is tied to social status. You expect some careers to earn a certain amount of money.
I get this. Readers of The Budgette know I advocate for money transparency because knowledge is power when negotiating salaries and project costs but I’ve hedged my responses depending on the situation and who’s asking. Now, Gen Z is loudly sharing their salaries and I love that. I’m not sure I’m quite ready to go that public. I’m still breaking through the weird taboo of discussing money at all.
I asked friends why they may not tell the truth about their salaries. Here’s what they said.
Three said their salaries are publicly available as they work for various public institutions. As one said, “Nope, I'm fully transparent. Given that as a government employee, my salary is public info and posted all over the internet, what's the point?”
- “Depends on who is asking.,” said another. “If it's family. Then yes [to lying] because nothing good would come from them knowing. But if it's a prospective employer then no.”
- “Not lie. At a younger age, I may have answered if the person asking shared their info and if I knew the person. Was the situation honest and the intent was peaceful or was the situation to probe rudely, etc.?
In addition, in my field, women often make less than male counterparts. Most apparently do not ask for an increase etc. As I aged this has changed, I do want younger women in my field to understand the salaries. [But] again, what is the context and situation? Was the question asked without a warning in a large environment? For what purpose is this person asking me to share this info?”
- “Not lie, but perhaps answer a slightly different question about remuneration. Are they asking for my salary or my package? Are they requesting this to determine the market rate, internal pay bands etc? Are we colleagues? Peers? Do we know each other solely in the workplace or have we met outside of the office?
And how do I expect them to use this? Anon as part of a market survey? For their hiring at another company? For their hiring at my company?
Many variables here.”
This answer is my favourite. You’ll see why:
- “I normally am transparent with friends/family depending on the person.
Coworkers have never asked me about my money. I have been asked if I got a raise and I will disclose if I am allowed to. A couple of times in my career, I was the only person to get a raise due to being lowest paid in the office and single income/divorced.
Potential employers - that’s a different animal as I always turn the question back at them, stating that I usually find what an employer provides to their admin staff is a reflection of the value they place on the position.”
As you see, there is context for everything. I’ll share with colleagues as part of a strategy for everyone to earn more and prevent wage discrimination. If it’s just nosiness, then I usually won’t share as I feel that’s status-fishing and I’m not playing that game with them.
And yes, you can discuss your salary in Ontario. Employees have the right to discuss their salaries. There is the Pay Transparency Act and Bill 149. The bill, if passed, would mean employers will have to include the expected compensation or the range in any publicly advertised job. However, it’s only for a specific salary range. It’s not bad but it’s not great. For example, it doesn’t require pay transparency for jobs with compensation over $100,000. B.C. also passed something similar but it’s better.
What do you think? Would you lie about your salary?
This week’s readings:
By me: How to insure your garden suite or laneway home in Canada (Ratesdotca)
Also by me: Don't want to end up in a nursing or retirement home? Some seniors are finding creative solutions — on their terms (Toronto Star)
Glad to see others are catching up. Now if only the government would. As more people choose the single life, researchers ask: are they happier? (CBC)
Some basic math here for those wondering if they can retire at 60. How delaying retirement can boost income for singles (Globe and Mail)
Scotiabank launched a new money style quiz. (This is not an endorsement but we all love a good quiz that tells us our style.) What’s your money style? (Scotiabank)
Hidden cameras reveal how big banks are upselling you (Marketplace) (YouTube)
Homeowners, realtors should take steps to protect against title fraud: experts (Canadian Press)
Could you tell it was International Women’s Day and Equal Pay Day recently? All the leaders weighed in but have they acted or are they still listening and learning? (Honestly, with the amount of ‘listening’ going on, some people are made up of nothing but ears but missing the eardrums.) Finance leaders weigh in on pay gap (LinkedIn)
Interesting. Older Adults Who Never Got Married Are Revealing The "Myths" About Being Single Later In Life That More People Should Know (Buzzfeed)
Why women are more likely to be unprepared for retirement — and what you can do about it (Toronto Star)
How to avoid paying the pink tax on clothes, toys and other everyday items (MoneySense)
Open banking is coming. Big changes are coming to how Canadians bank, but adoption likely to be slow (Canadian Press)